Thursday, January 19, 2017

I'd Like to Create a Farm-Style Domestic Abuse Shelter!

I know I am not alone. I know that there are other women (I use the term 'women' simply because I am a woman, I am really including all genders of abuse) out there with farms and/or multiple animals/pets that need to escape their abuser, have no where to go, and do not want to give up their animals. I mean, that is one of the reasons they chose us in the first place .... to be able to use our animals for leverage, to hold us here, to hurt us into control. I know first hand that hurting my animals hurts me far worse than actually hurting just me does. I have let myself be controlled to a degree to keep my animals safe. Having to give up our animals to escape the abuse/violence, rips us apart inside. It is like pouring salt and vinegar into our wounds of abuse. It also lets them 'win' to a huge degree, and that takes us almost, if not completely down to the bottom. Why on Earth, when we are desperately trying to get away from our abusers, trying to get out of our abusive, violent situation, do we have to add further hurt? Why do we have to break our bonds with the animals that were our rock while we were in this situation? Why do we have to further hurt our animals by separating them from us, by rehoming them or putting them down? Why do WE have to be further punished??? Further punished while our abuser sits back and sadistically relishes in the further hurt they have caused by us having to lose our animals in order to escape them. It just isn't right!!!!



I want to create a Farm-Style "shelter" for the victims of abuse with animals, to be able to go to "with" their critters, and not have to have that much more hurt in their lives by losing them. I understand their hurt and their pain. I want to prevent this type of unnecessary hurt and pain for as many as I can. Maybe others will pick up the concept, too, and reach even more that need this type of help. I am seeing, as I am visiting support groups for abuse victims (especially for victims of narcissistic abuse) that there is a growing number of abused farm women with multiple animals. I want to help that group, and any victims with animals that might otherwise need to be left behind.

To start with, I will need a large piece of undeveloped, unrestricted land. The one I have listed on this site under "Wish List" would be fantastic! I just have no way of going to look at it, much less to move me and everything there so I can get this started. I think anything from 5 to 10 acres would be great, but that 10 acres would be especially good.

Here are some of my roughed out thoughts on this Farm-style Shelter......
* large acreage that isn't too 'noisy' or out of the way, but is peaceful. It will need to be easy for business traffic to come to, but not so busy we feel hectic nor on display.

* semi-off grid  (just my thought at the moment - could be optional for the individual residents)

*use refurbished vintage travel trailers and/or tiny houses on wheels (keeps the taxes down if on wheels and small spaces are kind of cozy after all that abuse

*DO NOT set up like a trailer park, but like a small community with everyone having their own little space/yards. Not in rows or blocks, but kind of scattered.

* Gardens (flower, vegetable, fruit, and herb). Working in gardens helps relieve stress, gives a feeling of accomplishment and worth, can take anger and pent up frustrations out on weeds, eat healthier with the home grown foods.

* set up produce stand for any garden extras.

* set up a very small store close to the road (next to produce stand) to sell our handmade items, new retail items and other things, maybe a thrift store.

* set up and run a small flea market once or twice a month or so. It would help those living on the property that chose to participate to earn some money and flea market space rent to outsiders could be used to develop the farm shelter and upkeep.

* Have a small community building for the farm shelter residents. It would have electricity where those that are off grid can charge batteries, watch TV, use computers, etc.

* This would also be a great, 24/7 support group.

* As residents feel they are ready to move on, their space can be filled by yet another victim with animals needing to escape. 

These are my thoughts for now. I REALLY want to do this! I have considered a crowd funding for it, but don't want my abuser to see it. What are your thoughts on a crowd funding set up for this? I have never really wanted to use one, but it might be a good option to help get this off the ground. 

Blessings! and thanks for stopping in!

Signed - Betty Sue

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