That Flicker of Light is Gone Again

Yesterday morning, there was a flicker of light again. His old self returned for a few hours. But by last night, T L Ogre was back with a vengeance! This morning was even worse! I just don't know hoe I am going to take this until I can figure a way out of here! My poor old heart (literally) can't take it.

He caught me feeding some of that outdoor cats this morning and that set him off in a rage. Some of those cats were indoor cats and one of them just suspiciously lost a still born litter and she is old. She needs to be fixed!

The name calling is greatly increasing. He is especially making fun of my heritage. He has been calling me Polish Stubborn, over and over. He says I am so stubborn because I am Polish and bashes me being Polish in other ways, too. "Stubborn" translates to, "You won't let me control you!"

This morning he screamed at me that I was STUPID because I am Polish. He just kept saying that I am STUPID because I am Polish and that everyone Polish is STUPID!!!

A few days ago, and I am not even sure where it came from, he was in one of his violent, raging tirades and started SCREAMING at me, "You don't have ANY friends! No one is your friend! You don't have ANY friends around here, and you don't have ANY friends online. None of them are really your friend. NO ONE likes you! They all just PRETEND to be your friend! You have NO ONE!

Then it went on further to tell me that he DID have friends but he hasn't gotten to spend time with them since we got together, that it is my fault for that.

I have to get off of here for now. My bashed hand is killing me and I have a long, hard chore day ahead of me. We are supposed to have a super hard freeze the next few days. Single digits at night, low 20s by day (F), and many, many critters are not prepared for it. No hay and I need my hand to rake leaves, gather bricks to heat, and fire wood. Plus, yet  more puppies are being born right now. They need to be fixed!

 Come on..... just beam me and my critter babies up, Scottie, up and over to a piece of land and a home of our own!

Signed - Betty Sue